FRIDAY

ONE OF MY BOSSES AT ONE OF MY DAY JOBS EITHER TYPES ALL IN CAPS or only in lower case without any punctuation at all ever

I'm not sure why she does that.

I read an article once where they analyzed the emails of people at different levels within a corporate structure:

The highest level (CEO'S, Presidents) tended to do what this boss does - little to no punctuation, no effort to proofread or edit -- generally emails written with the urgency of "I never have enough time in my day to waste time being careful about what I send to you! And you have to understand what I am talking about because that is your job!"

Mid-level employees (where I usually exist) are the most careful with their emails. They edit them as they would a formal letter, punctuate properly, give them paragraph form, and write in complete sentences. Perhaps this is owed to an underlying desire to impress, to prove themselves, and to move out of mid-level...

And administrative support (secretaries, admin assistants) are most likely to add foofy things to the emails. Colored backgrounds. Little jumping smileys. Unusual fonts. Emoticons. You really rarely see that at any other level. Which may be a result of: "This job is so boring that the only way I can keep myself sane is by choosing the perfect shade of lilac for the backdrop to my Outlook emails and more - the bibilical quote that will send people on their day feeling blessed for hours, days, even weeks to come."

I for one pretty much hate emoticons, and only use them when I need to be passive aggressive with someone.

So, yeah - I was very suddenly feeling kind of down and profoundly alone yesterday. It made me think of the people I miss in NY, and the people I miss in general - friends I've lost, or lost touch with. Which is where the post came from.

I form very strong attachments to people. Not to A LOT of people, but when I do, I really do. As a result, I have a great deal of trouble letting someone go. This is probably why my best female friend is someone I met when I was seven.

I have always been this way. When I was young and friendships ran their natural course (something that happens, especially, with adolescent female friendships) I would react so emotionally and extremely - lashing out towards a friend who had distanced themselves from me, or against myself for driving that friend away - that to read those journal entries now makes me wish I could go back and hug my twelve year-old self. I'm better now. But I still have trouble letting things go.

And I was wallowing in that for a bit, for a number of reasons.

I adored the movie ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND.

Because we try to do that. We try to write people out of our histories. And I loved that the movie proved that, even if it were scientifically possible to do this, the human mind will not allow it. Because once you have known someone they will shape the way you look at the world - even if only in very small ways and select moments - even if only once a year or once a decade - they are there, inside you, forever. It brings me some comfort.

The driving force of the play I am working on is the need to be remembered, to make a mark. It drives all of us, I think.