Tinsel Snowflakes

I am trying to find some sense of normalcy and order in my life now that Alice has opened.

Why I should expect to return to normalcy and order when I have never really had either of these things in the past, I am not quite sure. But maybe this time they will magically... emerge. It would be nice anyhow.

The show had its first public performance on Friday night after three long tech rehearsals. We had rehearsal and a show on Saturday, then two shows on Sunday. We continue to learn more about the show based on the different audiences we have and will continue to rehearse and make minor changes through next week.

I don't really feel like talking about that right now. Too many days in the big white box in Foggy Bottom.

Apparently we are in the midst of the holiday season. My colleague just put a cd of Christmas Carols on that the Lighting Designer for Alice made with his partner to help spread the holiday cheer.

I'd almost forgotten that it was December. (Then I remember when I see the big tinsel snowflakes all over Capitol Hill). I'm not all that jazzed about the holidays this year. Sorry world. I am a crotchety little match girl this year.

But the Vince Guaraldi Trio's Christmas Time is Here is playing, and that at least makes me smile.

I don't know. The holidays are just so... loaded. I don't really have any spiritual connection to any holiday that comes around this time so I feel like kind of a fake in that respect. I am happy to see my parents and relax a bit, but with their new home it is not like I am revisiting childhood haunts (or seeing childhood friends). But, full disclosure, the idea of the holidays this year makes me blue. It just does.

Things could be worse. A number of people I know have suffered great losses recently, losses which will always coincide with the holiday season. That sucks.

I just kind of want to get through with them and move on. Does that make me a total grinch?