Seven Hours To Go

I am conflicted about what to write in the realm of end-of-the-year wrap-ups. I just looked back at my entries from the final days of 2005 and 2006 and had to cringe at how maudlin and emotional they are. Blah, blah, heartbreak, blah, blah, rejection, blah, blah, angst.

It makes me wonder again if I have out-grown this blog. I find myself conflicted over how much to share and what is appropriate to write about. Not to mention the question of: “who cares?” The fact is, the stuff that I have the strongest feelings about and would probably engage some spark behind my writing are the subjects I usually decide should not be shared with the world. So be it.

Anyway: 2007. I could certainly do a list-type retrospective, which works well for people. Hanvnah and Gwen both have fun ones (incidentally, I am honored to be amongst Hanvnah’s top portraits of 2007--red wine and cleavage, indeed!) But my mind and words are not lined up and orderly like that.

General impressions, thoughts and reflections are sure to work better for me. If I can manage that.

So I sat in a room the other night at an awful touristy bar in metro center eating a veggie burger and surrounded by James Brown’s spangled jacket and signed albums of Michael Jackson’s Thriller and I was a little bit too loud and a little bit too uncomfortable because at some point I realized that in this one room sat the three people who probably know me better than anyone else in this city. Sort of. I mean, friends know me well too. Maybe friends know me better. Maybe that’s been the problem with my relationships all along. Anyway, one of those people hates me, and one of those people has snatched up my heart, and one of these people seems generally unsettled around me and that’s my fault because I have made everything awkward with that when it could have been easy. And I thought, hmmm, DC, right?

Already, too much. Go back. Think again.

People, people, people. Relationships, friendships, partners, lovers, collaborators, family. People.

I had a great year. I had a tricky year. I had a busy year. I had an important year.

I had a year.

The year started off shitty. How’s that for a place to start. My new year’s plans to ring in 2007 were thwarted when the friend I was to be hanging out with called to tell me he was too stoned to make plans right now but that he’d get back to me in about an hour and we could talk then. I ended up hanging out with my cousin (whom I love), her boyfriend (whom I adore), and the back-rubber (two out of three isn’t bad).

Then several days of surprising emails and sleepless nights and too many tears and news that had absolutely nothing to do with me and finally I retreated into the cozy arms of my first show of 2007--WE ARE NOT THESE HANDS--where I got to spend hours on end with some of my favorite people in the world. From there I spent the next four month cocooned in my work. This was partly by choice but mostly out of necessity. AFTER DARWIN was on the heels of HANDS, and DALI came following close behind. The work was my love, my love was my work. I wanted to see only my actors and designers, I wanted to talk script and choices and research and design. As I recall, I had a few crushes on the young-uns here and there in the meantime, but for the most part I stayed guarded and content.

I am glad I had this time. I loved the work I was doing, and was glad to be a part of these creations.

I listened to a lot of This American Life’s. I watched Youtubes. I saw friends, magnificent friends. I made new friends, I saw old friends, I further developed friendships that were not quite young or old. I appreciated more and more my professional families: both with Shawn and with Catalyst. My parents visited many times. They saw my shows and we saw shows and exhibits together. I staged a sex scene. I learned about evolution. I learned about the Gulf War. I learned about China. I took a few trips to NY. I went to Kentucky for a few days for the Humana Festival.

April was eventful for the world. Terrible things happened at Virginia Tech and Eastern Market. We all dressed up and attended the Helen Hayes awards. And I successfully opened my third show in four months. I’d survived. I got a little sick. I caught up on sleep.

May was eventful for me. I moved, rather suddenly, that was a big thing. I worked with the Keegan folk and had a blast. And I went on a date for the first time in about five months. It went very well. It is at about this time that my blog entries started sounding uncharacteristically optimistic.

After that, summer hit. I went to the beach to celebrate friendships old and new. I had a birthday that I was late for. I met C’s family. We started Trixie and suddenly everything was “F-H” and “Fringe-y”. We returned to the Source and created funny moments. July was a fringe-alicious whirl. Then August came and I readied for weddings and travel. There were bridal showers and engagement parties, there were passports to get and bags to pack, and there were practical shoes to buy and time away to plan for. We produced Zidney for page-to-stage and then I was off to Ireland and Connecticut and things were good and bad and wonderful and complex and lonely and beautiful and filled with aches and smiles. Everyone and everything was going through a growing period. We grew, we did.

Then October and home and a beautiful wedding and a homecoming and lots of readings and workshops and then ohmigod is it November already? And pirates and an untimely death and thanksgiving and then December and holidays and parties and food and family and fun and love.

Geez-oh-pete’s 2007, I hardly knew you!

And with that, XXOO, to a year ended and a new one about to begin. Joy and peace and comfort to all of you.